The park is precarious, so I mainly walk in a field, away from the humans and the tourist spots that draw them here. The grass is wet and I watch as my boots turn from light brown to a soggy deep hue. The sun is bright and air cool; it is a nice day to be in the park. I hold on to the memories of exploring here, when occasional small talk with strangers occurred without underlying fear of contagion.
I focus on the animals, small birds whose names I do not know, large birds whose names I do, the police horses that hide behind the casting pools, dogs on long leashes, critters underground who have made themselves known with the dirt piles above. I go to see the bison but cannot get close enough to get a proper picture. I admire them from afar and send a mental signal of "hey, remember me?"
I can picture the other parts of the park I don't dare go on this day. I can recall how I felt standing by the dahlias, sticking my nose in every plant in the fragrance garden, watching the lawn bowlers, pretending I'm in the Netherlands when standing under the windmills, exploring the museums of art and science, listening to music by the park band, eating ice cream out of a local food truck, pedaling my bike through with a smile on my face many glorious days. Those carefree days will come again. For now, a beautiful day with a small side of anxiety is acceptable.
I focus on the animals, small birds whose names I do not know, large birds whose names I do, the police horses that hide behind the casting pools, dogs on long leashes, critters underground who have made themselves known with the dirt piles above. I go to see the bison but cannot get close enough to get a proper picture. I admire them from afar and send a mental signal of "hey, remember me?"
I can picture the other parts of the park I don't dare go on this day. I can recall how I felt standing by the dahlias, sticking my nose in every plant in the fragrance garden, watching the lawn bowlers, pretending I'm in the Netherlands when standing under the windmills, exploring the museums of art and science, listening to music by the park band, eating ice cream out of a local food truck, pedaling my bike through with a smile on my face many glorious days. Those carefree days will come again. For now, a beautiful day with a small side of anxiety is acceptable.
